The Paranormal Zone: Ghost Marriages
For this episode, I travelled to Taiwan to visit a temple dedicated to unmarried women who had passed on. I could not understand why a temple needed to be built for deceased unmarried women.
I soon found out that the Taiwanese believe unmarried women who pass away become wandering spirits. To send them to a better place, their souls have to be sent to a temple or married to a living man.
I was surprised to learn that prior to a ghost marriage, many customary rites need to be undertaken, just like in a marriage between two living people. Fascinated by this phenomenon, I met up with Master Zhou Ying-Jun, who has presided over many human-ghost unions.
She told me that the spirits of these women find their potential husbands when men who have had a string of bad luck visit places with plenty of yin energy such as hotels, riversides or abandoned places. The spirits then begin appearing in their dreams, sometimes even touching the men physically! They harass the men and attempt to convince them that their luck will change if they agree to the marriage. This goes on until the men finally relent.
Speaking to Dr Hou about Wu Wen-Da to further understand his psychological state
According to Master Zhou, in ghost marriages there are no divorces; however, the husband can marry a living woman and have children with her if he wishes. The living wife will have to respect the spirit wife as the first wife.
I couldn’t help but wonder who needed who more in this situation – the man, to change his luck or the lady ghost, to avoid being a wandering spirit.
In order to get an academic point of view on ghost marriages, I spoke to Professor Lin Mao-Hsien, a Taiwanese folklore scholar, who told me that ghost marriages could be traced back to the end of the Ming Dynasty. Professor Lin explained that there are two types of ghost marriages. The first is to change the man’s luck while the second is to marry off a young woman who had died before she could get married.
In the second instance, the family usually writes down the deceased daughter’s details and puts them in a red envelope, which they then randomly place on the floor or street. When a man picks up the envelope, the family will surround him and start referring to him as their son-in-law. Most men will agree to this marriage as they accept it as their fate.
Engaging with the Spirit Wife through the board game Teep Sin
After conducting some research, I came across a gentleman named Wu Wen-Da, who had been dreaming about a dead woman named Zheng Su Mei for nine years. Over that period of time, his dreams gradually became more and more vivid until at one point, they had even begun having sexual intimacy. After nine years of ‘courtship’, they decided to get married.
But before he got married, Wu went to meet with Zheng’s parents, as is customary, to ask for their daughter’s hand in marriage.
After talking to Wu, I learnt that he believed his marriage to be as real as any other marriage, and because he is married to Zheng, he believed that she was protecting him from unseen malevolent forces. Wu added that his wife had taken him to many places in his dreams – places that were too beautiful to describe – where they had consummated their relationship. He went on to say that the experience was even better than in real life.
While I respected his choice, I could not help but wonder if what Wu had encountered was real or a case of psychological disorder. My curiosity got the better of me and I decided to ask a psychiatrist, Dr Hou, to conduct some tests on Wu in order to assess his psychological state.
Dr Hou believes that Wu may have a condition known as culture-bound syndrome, which is a combination of psychiatric and somatic symptoms that are considered a recognisable disease only within a specific society or culture.
Engaging in Teep Sin with Wu Wen-Da and a medium
Together with my team, I decided to carry out an experiment. We played a game known as ‘Teep-sin’, otherwise known as the Chinese Ouija Board, to summon Zheng. Together with Wu and myself, a crew member sat in as an impartial observer. We also had Sophiyah, a medium. We hoped to communicate with Zheng and ask her more about her marriage with Wu. I also wanted to find out if Wu’s marital status was indeed one that was paranormal.
In the end, however, there were other spirits present, who obstructed us from communicating with Zheng. The obstruction became aggressive and they took possession of Wu. In order to not cause more harm to Wu, I decided to terminate the ‘Teep-sin’ session and get rid of the spirit. While I was slightly disappointed that the séance did not go on further, it was for a good reason.
Prior to coming to Taiwan, the concept of ghost marriages was alien to me. But during my time there, I had come to understand that ghost marriages are acceptable and symbolic in Taiwanese culture, with many social elements related to them. But whether these social elements are good or bad, will always remain subjective.
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Ghost marriage might not be heard of in other culture, but it is quite popular in Chinese culture. I have heard of it when I was younger. A man is chosen by a female ghost to be her husband and they have to go through a special ceremony to be married.
For some reason, it is usually a female ghost who is looking for a husband. The female ghost will give information of herself to the man and strange enough, this person did exist before and later passed away. If the man refuses to marry the female ghost, his life may be in danger. He can become very sick but once he marries the female ghost, everything will be fine.
It could be that this man and the female ghost have a very strong karmic connection and the female ghost is very attached to having a partner or be married. Her attachment is so strong that she will harm the man if he doesn’t fulfill her wish. I don’t know if she will become happier when she is married but it is definitely her attachment that traps her in the ghost realm.
What we see may not be true, what is true we may not see – Li Kim
Things are happening around the world without our acknowledgement. There are things beyond of human beings’ control and need not our approval to be happen. I rather be open minded and believe the possibility of the existence of things than being narrow minded and think that human being is the ultimate being on Earth and drown by our own ego.
I do heard about ghost marriage arrangement in Chinese tradition base from helping spirit can settle down and have a peace of mind to reincarnate to have better life rather born as spirit realm suffer long period of time. Personally i do respect how people belief by having ghost marriage arrangement and not critisize what others religion practice.
Is interesting article of paranormal zone and to get to know more in Taiwan, people still have ghost marriage. I hope people can understand and not critisize others religion belief.
Ghost marriage does exist and I’ve heard it many times since I was a child, but unexpectedly the history of Ghost marriage is started since Ming Dynasty, that is 700 over years ago.
Whether Ghost marriage is more beneficial to the human husband or the ghost wife, I believe this action will only strengthens both their attachments and it will end up very bad for them. In Dharma, we learn that when we took rebirth in 3 lower realms, that is because we have great attachments and created tremendous negative karma, and resulted we take rebirth there. That’s why Dharma practice is so very important, because if we do not learn to let go, if we do not put our Dharma practice into our live, we will ended up suffering more and taking rebirth in the 3 lower realms more and more.
It is indeed a very interesting and informative documentary. Ghost marriage, be it a cultural myth or science fact, it seems to bring some extent of fulfilment to one or both parties. I believe what Viktor Frankl said, ‘what a man actually needs is the call of a potential meaning waiting to be fulfilled by him’.
I have heard about ghost marriage, but it seems this practice is common in Taiwan really open my eyes. Most of the story I read, is that the guy was unwilling to marry the ghost wife, but in Taiwan it seems most of them are willingly married. I would say different culture have different believe and practice. We have to respect their believe.
The Ouija part amazed me and make me feel that I am so lucky that our Guru passed Dorje Shugden practice to us. When I heard the lady said there was a lion there, I know that Dorje Shugden is protecting us all the time no matter where we are, especially in dangerous situation like this.
This is something i used to be hearing about and primarily only happens among Taoists devotees. I can understand the arrangment for inter-realm marriage is most probably motivated by the potential benefits both parties can get out of this. For the human, it is the sort of protection and ‘guardianship’ he or she will potential get from while the ghost would get the sense of belonging (receiving blessings from prayers included) for having a body to cling onto as most are either attached to food or body. i find this culture absurd and for me it is not something i want to be involved into but i do understand both parties must have had strong karmic relation in the past that caused this to happen in the first place. Interesting article actually.
This is really interesting. I guess people who get involved into ghost marriages do have strong attachments and karma. It is very fortunate to know about Dharma and the negative consequences that such a marriage has. We learn that we should never engage with a ghost or spirit as we don’t know who we deal with. We can be tricked for many years and think that this ghosts is friendly, yet it can always get us back. On the other hand, a Buddha or Bodhisattva will never take advantage of us.
The video was quite scary when the session with the ‘Teep-sin’, known as the Chinese Ouija Board, took place. I am happy that the team is protected by Dorje Shugden always. Thank you Li Kim for sharing with us this practice. It is important to gain knowledge and develop wisdom to be safe.
Here is the link to the practice of Trakze, which can help us when we have a spirit problem: Dorje Shugden Trakze to Dispel Black Magic & Spirits https://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/buddhas-dharma/trakze-to-dispel-black-magic-spirits.html and you can watch the teaching video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oiNx7DENlfw&t=11s
Ghost Marriages?
At my point of views : In Malaysia, i heard that before. And from the The Paranormal Zone documentary ( Ghost Marriages ) even in Taiwan are popular too. As a Buddhist i strongly believe that if we don’t have the karmic connection with Ghost, we don’t even dream of them ( Ghost ), has a feeling on them ( Ghost ) and can’t even see them ( Ghost ) too. Except we accidentally enter into their territories ( Eg: An 100 years old house, hotel or graveyard ). If i have the ability to communicate with Ghost, i will do all my best to do more Buddhism Prayers ( Pujas ) to dedicate all the merits to them ( Ghost ) to go for a swift rebirth back as human form to practice Dharma.
This post is really an eye opening to me. I never know such custom is a norm in Taiwan. At one point I keep thinking the female spirit is so attached at the point after taking rebirth as spirit they still want to be attached to man. At another point if the living husband with good motivation do prayers for her and dedicate merits to her it may help for her future rebirth.
One thing that really struck me in the video is how a protector able to help and protect us when we are in danger. An enlightened protector with their compassion will always there for us but of course provided we have a good relationship with our Guru or our motivation is pure. This is truly shown here and it’s important for us at this degenerate time to have protector practice to provide conducive condition for us to do good deeds due to the obstacle we have created for ourselves may hinder or block us from doing so.
A long time ago I heard of people talking about ghost marriages but I cannot recall the details now. I do not want to dismiss or scoff at such traditional practice and belief just because I could not see or hear such things myself. Nor would I go on to other people’s FB page to condemn their religious practice and faith. I think it’s best I listen with an open mind and respect other people’s beliefs for they have their rights as much as I do.
I got to know about ghost marriages from watching movies. I am just surprised that it is still being practiced till today. And that it is done like as though it’s for two living people.
After reading Mr Wu’s relationship with Ms Zheng, I felt that it is real, unlike what the psychiatrist said. Being a spirit, I believe that they have the ‘power’ to make the other person experience physically and not forgetting that they can also help in other ways eg.changing luck.
This post also show how Dorje Shugden can protect a practitioner whenever there is harm. Always there to help and guide no matter where or when. Such a great practice for powerful protection!
This reminds me of school days and my uncle.
A few of my clasdmate who were chinese ed and they were playing Tip Seen using coin. I was just watching as it is creepy but do not know why they play. They were asking the spirits whether is female or male and name. Looking back at it,is quite dangerous and it may harm anyone of them if they are not protected.
On ghost marriage, it happen to my uncle. Not really marriage but the spirit only appear at night and look for my uncle . He was staying above the spare parts shop. He got very sick and to the extend he went to see a medium and to found out she is a spirits and looking for bf. What my uncle did was he create an altar next to the shop and pray to her. It could be karmicly connected from his previous life. Till today ,he still pray to her.
Paranormal stories always caught my attention. My first hearing of ghost marriage story was away many years ago. It was happened to my ex-colleague’s husband who was a lorry driver. Since he was always on road all time, nevertheless anywhere he will urinate. Apparently, luck struck him one day when he hit on the jackpot. Ever since he started to have dreams of a female spirit and mediums were invited and found out the spirit requested him to marry her. Of course, my friend refused for she thinks it’s ridiculous. They compromised to have a ‘house’ for the spirit and during the ritual, while it’s on burning a gasp of wind blew into my friend’s house. In Taoism, it means acceptance or inviting the spirit into the house. Seeing this in vain, my friend decided to move out of the house and never return. Such things happen precisely due to lack of awareness and consciousness which caused unwanted sufferings.
On the other hand, there is ghost marriage between spirits too. It happened was these spirits will inform their family members in their dream. The family members of the decease will make contact with other party and the wedding ceremony will be conducted by medium. I was curious why every existing of spirit is a female?
In the video session of “Teep Sin”, Dorje Shugden shows up on the table and been witnessed by lady medium Sophiyah who hardly know this Dharma Protector. This indicate whoever pray or practice Dorje Shugden, He will come and protect.
Yesterday during my dinner, I watched this video and read about this article. Certainly, I felt curious and creepy and even have goose bump. I did heard about Ghost marriage and that was the time I didn’t learn much about Dharma, didn’t know why there is a ghost, didn’t know why peoples react/do this way or that way.
Thanks to Tsem Rinpoche (Guru), Pastors, my mother, sister, Wai Meng and others. I have the opportunity to learn Dharma and I will elaborate from the Dharma point of view:
-Why there are ghosts/wandering spirits- that is due to a very strong attachment from previous life
-Culturally bound belief about ghost marriages- habitual imprint karmically both are connected from previous life
Come to think of it. Dharma is very important coz that is where we will know/learn what is karma (cause and effect) and what is suffering (samsara).
Thank you Kechara Paranormal team and that was interesting.
Thank you Kechara Paranormal team for this very interesting investigation on this culturally bound belief about ghost marriages by Taiwanese. It would appear that it is an acceptable cultural belief. On the surface, if it appeases the two parties involved , who agree to it, why not? However, we must see that the basis of belief in Ghost Marriages stem from the conventional prejudice that women must be married before they die.
If we understand from the Dharma viewpoint, women become wandering spirits because of very strong attachments and their grasping at these attachments in their previous lifetime. Hence appeasing them by marrying them to a living spouse will not help the wandering soul. On the side of the man who agrees to marry a spirit, the reasons are all wrong. How would a karmically caused string of bad luck be truly resolved by his marrying a ghost, which might seem to be able to protect for a while and change his fortunes round.
In reality, karmically, this is unlikely to happen. By this alliance with a spirit, he will be dragged into further negativities and reinforcing of negative delusions, creating causes for greater harm on himself ultimately.
This is a interesting episode. Where the ghost marriage is quite a popular culture but remain unspoken. This culture could trace back since the 3 Kingdoms. There are many types of ceremony on ghost marriage.
Ghost marriage is practiced in other country like Sudan and France. It is not only happening in girl but also to boy who are not married. An unmarried girl was believe to have no descendants to worship her, thus is important to find her a home. While unmarried boy arranged a ghost marriage to provide him with progeny to continue the lineage and give him his own descendants, to continue the family name, Once the deceased son had a wife, the family could adopt an heir, or a “grandson”, to continue on the family line. The purpose of the daughter-in-law was not to produce offspring, as she was to live a chaste life, but she became the “social instrument” to enable the family to adopt.Thus, the Chinese adopt ghost marriage with the thought the decease have his family line to continue, while the girl have been taken care off. In today’s legal, in Chinese society it is not bind by legal. But, in France, ghost marriage or to be called called posthumous marriage became legal in France by Article 172.
In this episode, Dorje Shugden appeared and protect the peoples around there during the calling ceremony, it is interesting because the medium could see Dorje Shugden, I believes she do not seen Dorje Shugden statue or images before, but, the way she describe is how Dorje Shugden appear to us. To me, Dorje Shugden always around us when we need help.
This is an interesting notion, I hope this culture and practice helps the deceased to be at peace with themselves and others.
Hmm i wonder if ladies if they learn not to be so attached will that help? Would non attachment teachings help ladies in case they die before they are married?
In most Chinese tradition, women must get married or she will be considered a stigma for the family or the society. Hence Ghost marriage is not uncommon in the Chinese tradition in order to make the unmarried women who died to fulfil her wishes.
Knowing how karma works, a wandering spirit is most probably caused by attachment. And the desire of getting married or wanting to get someone is a form of attachment, therefore at the point of death and holding on to this attachment, it may be one of the reasons the conscious mind became a spirit wandering around to look for what he/she had been searching before death. And sadly ghost marriage is a tradition that enforced this kind of attachment and it’s horrifying because it involves human. On the scientific point of view, i guess having delusional disorder or psychological disorder could be one of the sources that makes the living human involved in such activities.
I heard about Ghost Marriage 冥婚 since I’m young but it is always a mystery for me as some seems real and with a lot of unknown for me. This episode of The Paranormal Zone has presented the Ghost Marriage from different angles and dimension eg the cultural, spiritual, psychiatric, academic points of view and let me understand better on Ghost Marriage from various perspectives. For me, this is the union of human and spirit beings and to certain extend is not for me to judge it is good or bad but it is for me to respect the existence of it. It is all due to the karma and karmic connections that it happened. However, due to the attachment and delusions, this union is still very much affecting the beings to be stuck in samsara just like all of us. May i learn more Dharma and able to help all to be free from samsara.
From this video, another thing that caught my attention is that during the “Teep-sin” session, the medium Sophiyah saw our protector Dorje Shugden on the table protecting the team. He is always there to protect from harm and danger whenever we need.
谢谢丽金的分享。
这集Paranormal Zone 是华人熟悉的冥婚。 其实很多人对于冥婚都略有耳闻， 只是没有深入探讨这个课题。
佛教相信六道轮回， 在六道（人道、天道、阿修罗道、畜生道、饿鬼道和地狱道）里的众生都是因为摆脱不了贪、嗔、痴及欲望而一直轮回。 当然已经死去的人化成灵体或成为饿鬼道的众生也是和我们一样拥有欲望。 他们也希望可以吃东西、有人关心等等， 或许这些冥婚的新娘也是希望可以得到人的关爱， 才会形成这个习俗。
不过据我了解， 其实让鬼新娘与人类办冥婚也不是一个真正可以帮助到她们的方法。 她们会化成灵体很大的可能性是她们还对这个世间留恋。 让她们结婚只会让她们更执着。 在佛教我们可以进行法会， 或在盂兰盆节的时候供养僧侣， 然后把功德回向给她们。
在视频中， 丽金与男主角玩碟仙与所谓的“鬼新娘”沟通的时候， 灵媒看到一位有狮子头， 身穿黄袍的护法（特征与多杰雄登相似）站在碟仙版上方， 保护丽金与男主角。 这也说明护法修持对于我们的重要性。 佛教护法可以护持佛法修持者， 也可以免受邪灵干扰。 更多多杰雄登的资料可以点击 https://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/category/dorje-shugden 或 http://www.dorjeshugden.org
谢谢
Admittedly prior to this article, I used to generalise ghost marriage as either something done to appease spirits to avoid their wrath or something done for practical cultural reason such as to ensure succession or property division etc and not so much for romantic feelings. That’s probably because of most of my information about ghost marriages were from reading materials written from either sociology or feminist perspective. The love angle was to me, more of typical movie plots where it is usually about ill-fated love between a human and ghost. Thus, it is interesting to read about real life stories where it plays out just like a normal relationship except for one party being a spirit/ghost. However, whether for appeasement purposes, practical worldly arrangements or even driven by emotions of love, the bottom line is that such arrangements arose from and rooted in attachments or desire. On that note, I think the pertinent question is then whether to continuously play into such attachments or to explore and opt for better ways to address the situation. In any event, thanks for sharing another interesting paranormal tidbit.
Thank you Li Kim for sharing this article. Maybe Ghost Marriage is something quite common in Taiwan, but for me, I find it spooky. Since the deceased ladies’ spirits are sent to a temple where prayers will be done for them, don’t they get a rebirth rather than being a wandering ghost? To me, bad luck or not, it is our karma that have ripen. We have to accept it and not look for ghost marriages to solve the bad luck issue.
With folded palms,
Vivian
Surely there must be a way for the karma for both parties to play out rather than have a marriage between 2 realms? If one can conduct pujas to appease spirits and lead them to dharma and a better realms, then I believe there is another way to help the wandering spirit or the spirit of such unmarried women to not become wandering spirits.
I cannot believe that people do willing to marry a ghost as a wife and then treated her as she’s alive. Due to this old culture, people do believe that this will benefit each other although husband and wife are from the different realm. Is this a kind of a destiny that needed to continue so that everyone get what they want and live harmoniously together? What will the karma or destiny like after this life?
During the “Teep Sin” session, the media lady saw Dorje Shugden on the table. He was there to protect the people from the spirits. Dorje Shugden is always with us, to protect and to guide as long as you have faith in him.
I love this article! It’s extremely romantically scary. It’s pretty hard for me to accept this kind of beliefs,especially by setting a trap for the men to commit into a ghost marriage by randomly placing a red envelope for the men to step on. Thank you Li Kim for this very good write up. Hope to have more good reads from you. 🙂
Reading this article from Likim made me recall an incident in my family that happened in accordance to what Likim researched on, Ghost Marriages.
A daughter of the family was very brilliant and went for tertiary education in China with her fiancee. However, while they were in China, the daughter, my aunt died and as such the couple never fulfilled their dream of getting married and to live happily ever after.
The fiancee came back to Malaysia and married another girl. However, the couple conceived children but were still born.
My grandmother was approached to have a marriage between her deceased daughter to the fiancee (who went to study with her in China) and then to have the living wife of the fiancee as an adopted daughter.
In order to do well for the couple, my grandmother agreed and a marriage was conducted. The couple honoured her deceased daughter as first wife and the living one as second wife.
Thereafter, children were born to this couple and the wife was always considered a daughter of the family.
Interesting that this also happened in Malaysia, although long ago from my experience.
Thank you for sharing your story, Datuk May. Really interesting to learn about ghost marriages. While I don’t fully understand the rationale behind these marriages between 2 different realms, I am thinking that this need to be married could stem from attachments. After all, ghosts have desires just the same as humans, if not more.
Sharon, Thank you for your comments. Whether attachments or otherwise, or we believe or not, are not really that important. I suppose to have served the purpose of making something or someone better off in their lives is the criteria of performing or abiding to the request so made of my grandmother.
Most of all, the results was what was needed and accomplished. I suppose that is for being beneficial to others.
I heard about ghost marriage but surprise to know that it is common and acceptable in Taiwan and that they even built a temple for the unmarried woman who have passed on. It’s as if it is nothing wrong in marrying a partner from a different world. I believe it is a case where the spirit is unrest and that he/she still want to continue to look for a partner although they are in different realm. This could be the past connection that the spirit has with Mr Wu. It is scary though, a person would marry a spirit. Thank you Li Kim for sharing this finding in Taiwan.
It must be very chilling to “play” Teepsin summoning the unseen but found other spirits present! It will be a break through if the spirit of Zheng can confirm the marriage to Wu. Because this is indeed one of a kind and unimaginable by the common people. From a Buddhist perspective, we believe that if there is no karmic affinity, one will not have a connection with the unseen. Hence, it is likely that Zheng and Wu had an unfinished relationship from previous lifetimes. However, it is yet to be seen whether such a relationship will be beneficial or healthy to both parties, who after all are from different realms! Thank you for this sharing, Li Kim.
Interesting article ,i have heard of ghost marriages stories before. A temple dedicated to unmarried women who had passed on sound interesting which i have not before.Surprised to know they have it in Taiwan which i have not come across.
Well ghost marriage still exists among the Chinese and is known as Yin Ch’u in Malaysia,Singapore and HongKong.I am sure maybe other Asia countries too especially those older generation.
Its a old chinese tradition ,when something happen as mention by Li Kim.The practice of ghost marriage in other forms, though rare, is prevalent is some parts of the world. There are reports of it being practiced in China even today, though its origins are unknown.
Chinese ghost marriage is conducted for a variety of reasons.
Thank you Li Kim for sharing these interesting post at least the younger generation know and understand a bit of it and it do exist.