Reading My Journey in This Life
When I first laid eyes on My Journey in This Life, it was the picture of His Eminence Tsem Rinpoche on the cover that caught my attention. It’s a striking portrait of Rinpoche riding a horse and galloping towards the reader, which is unusual considering the fact that I had never seen Rinpoche on a horse before. Nonetheless, it is considered auspicious and respectable for a high lama to be depicted in this manner because it symbolises that the lama is traveling to teach and benefit others. Perhaps, it also represents our hope for Rinpoche’s swift return. Behind Rinpoche, we can see a range of misty snow mountains that reveal a number of distinct city skylines, all of which hinted at the epic story that was about to unfold within the pages of the book.
Just like many other students, I looked forward to reading Rinpoche’s autobiography because I longed to rekindle the magic of listening to Rinpoche tell a story. Rinpoche was a masterful storyteller and was so highly engaged with his audience that his mere words could send you on a magical adventure. Although there is a vast difference between listening to Rinpoche and reading his words, upon reading the initial chapters, I felt that Elizabeth Kaye managed to preserve Rinpoche’s unique voice. I found that the narrative conveys honesty, wit, humour and a dash of tenderness that closely resembles the flavour of Rinpoche’s teachings.
While turning the pages, I couldn’t help myself from laughing during light-hearted moments and weeping when tragedy struck. At crucial junctures, I was overwhelmed with emotion simply because it brought back personal memories of Rinpoche that as students, many of us are familiar with. At times, I had to put the book down to take a breather from the raw emotion of it all and then pick it back up at a later time when I was less emotionally involved. Perhaps, I was overly invested with reliving my experiences with Rinpoche but on this point, I felt the book managed to convey Rinpoche’s intimate thoughts pretty well. The pace of the story was also good and although I wished there could have been more emphasis on certain aspects of Rinpoche’s life, I can see that the author tried to keep to a certain stride in the storytelling.
In the traditional sense, biographies or autobiographies of high lamas, such as this one, are an important genre of literature within the Tibetan Buddhist canon. These texts are known as namthar or ‘liberating stories’ which self-explains the purpose of these accounts. Such texts are meant to inspire faith in the reader by recounting the deeds and accomplishments of the lama and to assert the legitimacy of the lama’s lineage and teachings. For instance, within Lamrim texts, the story of Atisha is told to express the ‘greatness of the author’ in order to inspire faith not just in the lama but also in his teachings, lineage and various works.
Upon reading Tsem Rinpoche’s autobiography, it is apparent that Rinpoche’s life journey began quite differently from most other lamas. Naturally, most Tibetan lamas are born and raised in Tibetan society; recognised by senior high lamas and monastic authorities; and given a traditional spiritual education within the confines of a monastery from a very young age. When the lamas come of age, they start teaching, usually within the monastic environment and later travel throughout the country or abroad, perhaps to the Far East or to the West in order to teach and establish a Dharma centre.
In contrast to this, Tsem Rinpoche was born and raised far from the Tibetan community. Rinpoche was born in Taiwan and later taken to the United States where he was brought up as an ordinary suburban American boy, receiving a secular education. Rinpoche had little exposure to Buddhism except through books and the occasional visit to the temple. In spite of this, the young Rinpoche naturally developed an intense longing to practise Buddhism and it was clear that the visits to the temple, the teachings he received from his teacher and the books he read voraciously opened up something deep within him that was not of his current lifetime. In Buddhism, we call these ‘imprints’ from previous lives. Rinpoche’s Dharma imprints were very strong and that is why he developed deep spiritual inclinations at such a young age. This is one of the hallmarks of a tulku.
In the Tibetan tradition, a reincarnated teacher or lama is known as a ‘tulku’, which literally means ‘emanation body’ of a Buddha. On the other hand, ‘Rinpoche’ is a title bestowed on a tulku upon formal recognition. This title is normally given by monastic authorities, high lamas, influential oracles and sometimes the Tibetan government. Formal recognition does not necessarily mean that the teacher is highly attained but it definitely means the master has taught the Dharma and benefited people in his previous life. The recognition is meant to open his imprints so he can continue benefiting others. Either way, it is important that young tulkus are recognised and are placed under the right tutelage and education in order to open up their imprints, so that they can swiftly become great and beneficial teachers. This is particularly important for tulkus who are not highly attained as some might be led astray and therefore be unable to fulfil their aspirations from previous lives. Highly attained tulkus, however, will not be led astray and no matter what circumstances they are born into, they will find their way back to the Dharma.
As we can see from his autobiography, Tsem Rinpoche continued to pursue spirituality against all odds and thus proved his high spiritual attainments. Even at a young age, he already knew that living an ordinary life of pursuing secular education, having a career, building relationships and getting married were not for him. He was wise beyond his years and observed that the happiness derived from such pursuits is illusory. This observation made his resolution to pursue spirituality all the more compelling. Due to terrible abuse and opposition from his adoptive parents, Rinpoche decided that the only way out was to run away. He attempted this several times and eventually succeeded on his fourth try. He arrived in Los Angeles and searched for a Dharma centre. Eventually, he discovered Thubten Dhargye Ling (TDL) and came under the care of the wise Geshe Tsultim Gyeltsen.
It was at TDL that Tsem Rinpoche met His Holiness Kyabje Zong Rinpoche and what ensued was a whirlwind of teachings, initiations and devotion which resulted in a spiritual bond that seemed to come from a different lifetime. It is evident that Guru Devotion was one of Tsem Rinpoche’s main practices and this is made obvious by how Tsem Rinpoche spoke about Kyabje Zong Rinpoche. Their connection was brief but undeniably deep even though they didn’t speak the same language. What transpired during this period would come to shape and define Rinpoche’s life, up until his passing. Most of Rinpoche’s main meditational practices and teachings were from Kyabje Zong Rinpoche, especially the protector deity Dorje Shugden that would eventually become part and parcel of his life’s work.
It was Tsem Rinpoche’s lifelong wish to be a monk that eventually led him to make the promise to Kyabje Zong Rinpoche to take monastic ordination. He would later fulfil this promise and journey to Gaden Monastery, which was re-established in South India after the Cultural Revolution in Tibet. Rinpoche’s journey was very different compared to other lamas since he had to uproot himself in order to travel to India to be ordained. He did all that in spite of the tremendous language and cultural barriers he had to overcome. His unique background allowed him to have the right exposure of East and West, which would come to be the right preparation needed in his work to teach and benefit many.
Throughout his life, Tsem Rinpoche received a number of recognitions regarding his incarnation status but none were as compelling as when he first met His Eminence Gangchen Rinpoche, who would later become one of his esteemed teachers. Lama Gangchen Rinpoche upon sight, singled Tsem Rinpoche out from the crowd and requested him to sit on a throne and thus, proclaimed him to be a Rinpoche. Gangchen Rinpoche became very interested in Tsem Rinpoche and requested for his life story to be told. Later, Gangchen Rinpoche insisted that Tsem Rinpoche inform the abbot of the monastery, Khen Rinpoche Jampa Yeshe (who was also one of Tsem Rinpoche’s teachers) to enthrone him. This eventually resulted in his formal recognition by the monastery. On a personal basis, Tsem Rinpoche initially doubted his recognition and wanted to revert to being an ordinary monk. Needless to say, that was not possible and Gangchen Rinpoche later told Tsem Rinpoche that he himself had felt the same way too in the past, and prophesied that Tsem Rinpoche would eventually do twice the work of his lamas.
In one of the crucial moments in the book, Tsem Rinpoche talks about Dorje Shugden, the protector deity and practice that came to dominate his teachings and works. Rinpoche spoke about it chronologically, much of which was already explained at length in his four-hour talk called ‘Dorje Shugden: My Side of the Story’. However, there are some intimate details that can only be found in the book that, as it turns out, were a revelation for me. Over the years, I received bits and pieces of the whole history of Rinpoche and Dorje Shugden and now, with this book, the pieces have all come together. That’s why this book is great reading for anyone interested to know more of the backstory of Rinpoche’s practice of Dorje Shugden. In reading the book, it gave me an appreciation of the tremendous sacrifices and struggles that Rinpoche went through for the sake of proliferating Dorje Shugden’s lineage.
Going back in time, we find that Tsem Rinpoche first came to Malaysia in order to raise funds and teach due to the instructions of Kyabje Lati Rinpoche as backed up by Dorje Shugden through an oracle. Rinpoche expressed that it was not his intention to travel and teach as he had always wanted to retire in the hills and be a hermit-meditator. Although reluctant to teach, Rinpoche did it anyway and his reluctance was by no means an obstacle to fulfilling his teacher’s instructions. In fact, Rinpoche was so successful in his initial endeavour that Malaysian students came looking for him in the monastery and in the end, he was instructed to return to and remain in Malaysia. Rinpoche was again reluctant but did his utter best despite the numerous setbacks and obstacles he faced. Rinpoche also expressed some of the disappointments he felt but these never held him back or stopped him from doing more. That itself is inspirational because it shows that Rinpoche’s teachings were born out of self-sacrifice and are a true gift to all who are benefited by his works.
Notwithstanding the setbacks, Rinpoche persevered and Kechara was founded with its various departments, especially Kechara Forest Retreat. Despite undergoing many obstacles over the years, Rinpoche never took no for an answer and developed the organisation to what it is today. The teachings he gave and the organisation have become his lasting spiritual legacy for future generations. Rinpoche had hopes that Kechara Forest Retreat would not just be a Tibetan Buddhist temple or an institution of learning but a place where future Dharma teachers and Sangha members are nurtured and educated. In this way, the Dharma will be preserved for future generations, just like how Lama Tsongkhapa’s teachings and lineage have been preserved by the great monasteries of Gaden, Sera and Drepung, which produce numerous great monks, yogis, scholars and teachers.
As I approached the epilogue, a deep sense of loss overwhelmed me that someone who had so profoundly changed my life and the lives of many in Kechara is no longer with us. As I closed the book, I was left with a deep sense of intimacy and perhaps a broader understanding of Rinpoche’s personality and goals. In the end, Rinpoche left behind a sprawling organisation that is a spiritual home to many, one that gives a sense of belonging that allows us to practise the Dharma in accordance to our lineage. If you ask me, “what did you get from reading this book?”, I would say it is a living account of a lama who grew up as a boy, who to all appearances seemed ordinary, but went on to become great by overcoming tremendous obstacles by producing a spiritual legacy.
My Journey in This Life is available in paperback and ebook (EPUB, MOBI) editions. Get your copy at Vajrasecrets, Amazon, Google Play and other good bookstores.
For more interesting information:
- The Parinirvana of H.E. Kyabje Tsem Rinpoche
- The Tsem Rinpoche Relic Stupa Project
- The Promise – Tsem Rinpoche’s inspiring biography now in ebook format!
- My Precious Teachers
- Meeting Kyabje Yongyal Rinpoche in New York
- The Train
- I’m Requesting Ordination in 1987
- Kyabje Zong Rinpoche Cuts My Hair
- My Message to Lama Zopa Rinpoche
- My First Guru in New Jersey
- Kentrul Thubten Lamsang
- Visiting My Parents – Tsem Rinpoche
- VIDEO: (Re)visiting an Extraordinary Life: The Tsem Rinpoche Biography Group in the USA
- Avalokiteshvara, Turkey Swamp, Marc & Me
- The Cowshed That Was My Home in Gaden
- 700 Meet A Buddha
- Dorje Shugden: My Side of the Story
- Tsem Rinpoche’s heritage in China
- Tsem Rinpoche’s Torghut Ancestry | 詹杜固仁波切的土尔扈特血统
- How Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen changed my life
- Dharma Work, Attitude & TDL | 佛法工作、态度及图登达杰林佛法中心
- Short sharing about Kyabje Zong Rinpoche | 关于嘉杰宋仁波切的简短分享 | ༧སྐྱབས་རྗེ་ཟོང་རྡོ་རྗེ་འཆང་གི་སྐོར་བགོ་འགྲེམས་མདོར་བསྡུས།
Please support us so that we can continue to bring you more Dharma:
If you are in the United States, please note that your offerings and contributions are tax deductible. ~ the tsemrinpoche.com blog team
Mum and I can’t wait to invite this new autobiography of Rinpoche’s . Looks like Rinpoche is giving a clue from where he would be returning from, and who knows…..perhaps another emanation of Gyenze after Rinpoche’s Mongolian Guru Deva Rinpoche.😎Thank you Rinpoche and Pastor David for sharing this wonderful autobiography. 👍🙏😍
Reading this post had me recalling how I came into Kechara , learning and practicing dharma from scratch and the moment I first time met Rinpoche. Well reading this wonderful book My Journey in This Life, tells us more. Beautiful writeup autobiography of H E Tsem Rinpoche . Elizabeth Kaye, the New York Times who is the best-selling author and award-winning journalist who came all the way to meet and interview Rinpoche.
Rinpoche’s life journey was indeed special and quite differently from most other Tibetan lamas. Born in Taiwan , taken and raised in Tibetan society in US. Having a strong imprint of Buddhism leading Rinpoche to developed deep spiritual inclinations and received teachings from his teacher at a young age. Through up and down hardship experience he managed to travel to India . The rest is history having tremendous language and cultural barriers Rinpoche never give up. Later as advice by his teacher he travel to Malaysia and establish a Dharma centre. We are very fortunate indeed to have Rinpoche in Malaysia. Interesting read and worth having this beautiful book .
Thank you Rinpoche and Pastor David for this sharing.
Thank you P. David for the glimpses into Rinpoche’s autobiography – My Journey in this Life. Your warm hearted commentaries has taken me onto the inspiring and compelling journey of Rinpoche’s life and makes me eager to start reading it immediately. Gotta admit haven’t got the chance to read it yet but it’s definitely on my reading list. Meaningful and touching article…and thanks to P. Niral for given us the heads up on this article of P. David.