10 Choices You Will Regret 10 Year Later
As a Dharma teacher, I have met many different people throughout the years. And almost everyone I meet has experienced regret at some point in their lives, some more than others. Some have achieved their goals of wealth and fortune, others have found fame and renown, and many have lived ordinary lives with family and friends surrounding them. Yet, no matter how successful, famous, wealthy, etc they are, everyone has something they wished they could change or could do differently, if they had the chance… For some, life had even become meaningless.
I have explained many times that regret stems from repeated actions of practicing the eight worldly Dharmas and clinging onto the three poisons of samsara. When we practice and habituate ourselves in these negative traits for many years, as the days pass we become more egocentric, more self-absorbed, more lazy, more self cherishing… And when we look back at all the time we have spent which did not add real value to our lives or to other people’s lives, we feel that we have wasted our time… and that brings about a deep feeling of regret, because deep down inside, we realize that we did not use our limited time in this life well. Regret is helpful but not the only answer, but change is. To change what we regret about.
So when I read this article about ’10 choices you will regret in 10 years’, I wanted to share this with everyone. I believe many of us will be able to relate to the advice given here as these are common mistakes we make all the time. Don’t regret later, please read the article now and make the choices that are right for you. I wish everyone well and keep up at transformations because you are worth it.
Tsem Rinpoche
10 Choices You Will Regret In 10 Years
“If only…” These two words paired together create one of the saddest phrases in the English language.
Here are ten choices that ultimately lead to this phrase of regret, and how to elude them:
1. Wearing a mask to impress others.
If the face you always show the world is a mask, someday there will be nothing beneath it. Because when you spend too much time concentrating on everyone else’s perception of you, or who everyone else wants you to be, you eventually forget who you really are. So don’t fear the judgments of others; you know in your heart who you are and what’s true to you. You don’t have to be perfect to impress and inspire people. Let them be impressed and inspired by how you deal with your imperfections.
2. Letting someone else create your dreams for you.
The greatest challenge in life is discovering who you are; the second greatest is being happy with what you find. A big part of this is your decision to stay true toyour own goals and dreams. Do you have people who disagree with you? Good. It means you’re standing your ground and walking your own path. Sometimes you’ll do things considered crazy by others, but when you catch yourself excitedly losing track of time, that’s when you’ll know you’re doing the right thing.
3. Keeping negative company.
Don’t let someone who has a bad attitude give it to you. Don’t let them get to you. They can’t pull the trigger if you don’t hand them the gun. When you remember that keeping the company of negative people is a choice, instead of an obligation, you free yourself to keep the company of compassion instead of anger, generosity instead of greed, and patience instead of anxiety.
4. Being selfish and egotistical.
A life filled with loving deeds and good character is the best tombstone. Those who you inspired and shared your love with will remember how you made them feel long after your time has expired. So carve your name on hearts, not stone. What you have done for yourself alone dies with you; what you have done for others and the world remains.
5. Avoiding change and growth.
If you want to know your past look into your present conditions. If you want to know your future look into your present actions. You must let go of the old to make way for the new; the old way is gone, never to come back. If you acknowledge this right now and take steps to address it, you will position yourself for lasting success.
6. Giving up when the going gets tough.
There are no failures, just results. Even if things don’t unfold the way you had expected, don’t be disheartened or give up. Learn what you can and move on. The one who continues to advance one step at a time will win in the end. Because the battle is always won far away and long before the final victory. It’s a process that occurs with small steps, decisions, and actions that gradually build upon each other and eventually lead to that glorious moment of triumph.
7. Trying to micromanage every little thing.
Life should be touched, not strangled. Sometimes you’ve got to relax and let life happen without incessant worry and micromanagement. Learn to let go a little before you squeeze too tight. Take a deep breath. When the dust settles and you can once again see the forest for the trees, take the next step forward. You don’t have to know exactly where you’re going to be headed somewhere great. Everything in life is in perfect order whether you understand it yet or not. It just takes some time to connect all the dots.
8. Settling for less than you deserve.
Be strong enough to let go and wise enough to wait for what you deserve. Sometimes you have to get knocked down lower than you have ever been to stand up taller than you ever were before. Sometimes your eyes need to be washed by your tears so you can see the possibilities in front of you with a clearer vision again. Don’t settle.
9. Endlessly waiting until tomorrow.
The trouble is, you always think you have more time than you do. But one day you will wake up and there won’t be any more time to work on the things you’ve always wanted to do. And at that point you either will have achieved the goals you set for yourself, or you will have a list of excuses for why you haven’t.
10. Being lazy and wishy-washy.
The world doesn’t owe you anything, you owe the world something. So stop daydreaming and start DOING. Develop a backbone, not a wishbone. Take full responsibility for your life – take control. You are important and you are needed. It’s too late to sit around and wait for somebody to do something someday. Someday is now; the somebody the world needs is YOU.
[Extracted from: http://www.livebuddhism.com/2014/06/ten-choices-you-will-regret-in-10-years.html]
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Thanking you for the advice and the wonderful sharing. I truly believe and agree on what you have said in this article.
Every things comes into our lives for some reason or another and we don’t always know their purpose until it is too late. They all play some kind of role for lifetime or for a short while due to our attitude and mistakes.
Nothing is too late if we were to learn the process a little better and take full responsibility for taking control of our life. Basically, if we to understand and know that there is a specific reason for all the hardship, it could help us to learn how to get through it in a positive way.
I’m sure at some point in our life, you’ve had to endure some form of hardship. We all have.
As time goes by, our life becomes more and more difficult. The biggest challenges aren’t someone else but ourselves.
We can either focus on what is tearing us apart, or what is keeping us together. Have the courage to push harder fighting our ego to transform our mind. Soon we can achieve more than we could ever imagine.
Good reminders for a good change. One will never be able to make a change in life until he/she changes something he/she does daily. I strongly believe that the secret of success is found in daily routine. Be open minded and start NOW.
What was mentioned above was my daily practice until I met Rinpoche in my mid 30s. When you are in front of your Guru, you are basically has no chance to hide away anything from his wisdom eyes. No matter how hard you tried. Even though sometime i thought i did get away but actually i didn’t. At some points i have came to realise that it was just my very kind Guru letting me win because of my huge ego. Rinpoche’s words loud and clear, woke me up many times and pushing me to move forward.
My gratitude to Rinpoche for hooking me up from indulging in those 10 regrets. This is what Rinpoche is doing for countless people daily. Rinpoche’s life story itself is a very good teaching for us. Rinpoche showed us what we can achieve when we chose to control and be responsible for our own lives.
The Promise – https://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/me/tsem-rinpoches-inspiring-biography-now-in-ebook-format.html
Absolute truth, and definitely what most of us needed. I believe these are the biggest factor between average and highly successful peoples. This is all about the choices we make the first thing we wake up in the morning, and little by little become our life and we regret. Regrets can either suck away our present happiness and restrict our future, or motivate us to move forward. Is a choice again. Someone told me this that I think is also good to remind us is our daily life “Are you a person make things happen or watch things happen or wonder what happened”. Just put this 10 points into practice before regret.
The worst thing to happen is most times, we know all the quotes up there very well but often didn’t put to practice. Thats what causing us to be suffering in the first place.
If not now, when?
[/b]– Tsem Rinpoche[/b]
A power quote that I got from H.E Tsem Rinpoche which has become a powerful reminder of life for me. Life is short & death is certain, when is not. If we don’t change or do something to be better now, the “later” we used to plan will rarely happen.
I’m sure everybody made mistakes in their lives. When we realized we made a wrong thing or choice, we start feeling regret. Many people intend hiding this guilt by ignoring or blame on others of the cause. As this attitude worsen, we became more unhappy, angersome and the character starts to stays in.
How to overcome regrets? We need to be honest to ourselves, understand our mistakes, accept and make a change. Cultivating positive thoughts or creating a happy environment around us may be a good kick-start.
Almost everybody in the world did or does one of the choices mentioned above. We tend to come across many people around us who’s still carrying at least one of the choices. As long as we practice our dharma well, and stay our mind clear, we won’t be easily got influenced by any of them. Even though we still carry one of the choices, or even more than one of them, by regretting won’t help us to achieve anything, change and move on, is the only way that enable us to become a better person.
Quote:
‘Regret is helpful but not the only answer, but change is. To change what we regret about.’
Unquote.
Short and powerful. We keep falling into the hole again and again, and each time it gets harder and harder to climb out. We have to do our best to avoid the hole.
I think Dharma is the most important thing to overcome all these choices that make us regret later. By having Dharma, we will try to think and see things from different angle. We will also try to contemplate on the situation that happen and resolve it in the best manner. We might also think why we are always caught up in a situation and when we re-think and contemplate, it might be our karma manifesting. Hence, we need to do the necessary so that it will not happen again on us.
We should not just stop at mistakes nor regrets. Instead we should pick ourselves up and think of the mistakes or what went wrong. From there, we can learn and improve ourselves. Lets not get stuck with the past and blame everyone else for the choices we made. Look forward and think what we want to do for our future where we can look back and be proud. We must be able to accept and analyse when we are put down or criticised. We are the choices we make and nobody can force us to do what we do not want. The above article is short, concise, easy to understand and contemplate. Good to remind ourselves from time to time.
Regrets are the things in living that will constantly haunt us. Having regrets can be good if we do not let them tie us down and bind us to become depressed and unable to move forward.
Most of the 10 illustrations of regret have been experienced by most people, it is choices how to overcome regrets that makes living challenging and exciting.
Being regretful is a choice and learning from regrets of what we have done badly or dissatisfactory, we can also make the choice to not do the same and have a new insight to all people, events and things.
Live with the choice to change ourselves so that we have results that will not cause harm to others and to regret later.
Live not in the past nor the future but only in the moment of now to create satisfaction and not regrets.
The 10 choices are really powerful and it’s what we are doing everyday whether we realise it. It’s always the matter of choice. It can be a choice to hide ourselves and stay stagnant in our comfort zone or to expand ourselves to explore the unknown which in turn open our mind to learn more and make a different for our future.
We should be in control of our life and make a choice that we want to make a better change for our future. ‘There are no failures, just result.’ This is really impactful for me. We are so fear of failure and it stop us from moving forward. I think we have to put away of people’s judgement as what important is we should be in control of our life and action. We should be fearless to try and explore and just keep moving. There will be people talking around us whether we do it. Since this is the case we my as well just do it and learn along the journey. We may fall and may be criticize but at least we try and learn instead of sitting, doing nothing and just leave our life in the dark and keep seeing people around us moving on. Eventually we will be in depression by our own action and turn our way to a negative route by developing anger, jealousy, hatred and much more negative action.
Everyone deserve to live their life meaningfully but it takes courage to make the choice.
This article remind me to be a true man to my families, my friends and to everyone. I should pay more attention on what is valuable in my life. Thanks
A good reminder to me and everyone. Thus, it is our choice to act upon it or will regret later on. I agreed with the choice number one which is the ‘wearing mask to impress others’, there are many types of people out there so in my opinion always be who you are and happy in whatever we are doing with right motivation. Thanks Rinpoche for the article.
These are practical advise so we won’t live a life that we regret. One of the core ingredients of living a life without regret is to continuously learn and grow. If learning stops then we are but a living corpse, who just get by.
“There are no failures. just results’. This is so true for all of us. We are so fearful of failures, our ego cannot stand the embarrassment when others find out we made a mistake, we was not correct. Therefore we never made the move, pull the trigger, frozen with indecision, inaction and as time goes by, it get worse, it gets too late, we fire fight..This phrase is so useful and powerful to share..It empowers us to just do it and not wait for perfect solution and learn as we go along. Sometimes is better to ask for forgiveness and not permissions..
Thank you Rinpoche for the sharing.
Firstly this article has rang a bell for me. Yes we are human being and everyone is imperfect so why we stress on ourself on gaining the “perfection” thinking that it can impress and inspire people? Why not we change our perception and let them be impressed and inspired by how we deal with our imperfections.
There is no need for someone to tell us who we are. We should discover who ourselves and be happy with what we find.
I totally agree with Rinpoche that we must let go of the old to make way for the new; the old way is gone, never to come back. If we acknowledge this right now and take steps to address it, we will position ourselves for a lasting success.
I am happily to share with Rinpoche that yes, I am making the change step by step.
With the daily sadhana my life become lighter, when I face difficult situation my emotion become stable than my previous days and the stability always leads me to the solution although sometimes it couldn’t create a win win situation but most of the time it ended with minimum hurt and argument.
Finally, thank you Rinpoche for the Dharma teaching, your talk, your articles, your books and your sharing always inspired me and motivated me to continue on the path to seek for spiritual practice. Thank you.
Humbly with love and folded hand ,
Ng Jesvin
Dear Rinpoche, thank you for sharing these good reminders. I like the part where its says ” there are no failures, just results”. So often we afraid to move on and make decision and pull the trigger. Normally out of fear of getting blame and other see our true weaknesses, when the only weaknesses is ourselves. I had save these and will look at it once a while .. I also shared these out with my colleagues. my friends and my children. I think we all need to be reminded once in a while and be encourage by these..Thank you Rinpoche
So long as we learn from any actions however bad the consequence or results are, then it is not a loss or failure. So, fear of failure that holds back anyone from taking that step forward is nothing but another mundane concern. They are still very attached to their ego fulfilling the expectations and perceptions of other people around them. Once the expectations are put aside, then there is only the neutral effect of results, then there is no failure.
Thank you, Rinpoche for sharing this article to let us reflect on our lives so far and enable us to contemplate on our choices for a change.
Thanks Guru for the sharing, this will serve as a reminder for us. We sometimes tend to be so absorb with the life activity we need to step back and reflect often. Our hope is to live our life without regrets. Thanks again for the sharing Guru. _/|\_
We all have been and will be in this boat at one time or another, and frequently too.
This article argues well to remind us to move on to being of service to others while we are still able to, and to get rid of our bad habits.
Do it and there will be no regrets.
I also like the part where it says that there is no such thing as failure, only results. This is very deep thinking.
To have the results, one has to create the causes. If one does not create the causes, there is no failure, just no results that’s all.
Thank you Rinpoche for highlighting this very thoughtful article.
All regrets stem from the negative karma resulting from our deadly poisons of ignorance, anger, attachments, pride, jealousy and doubts.For those who may have the great fortune to meet the Dharma at a young age, may have none or less regrets in life. Dharma is the potent medicine to all the points mentioned in this article. First and foremost we will need to have the realisation of our negativity before any anti-dote (regret is one) can be effective. Upon realisation and application of an antidote, our negativities can be purified.
The examples above are very common and real and many of us have or will face them. Thank you Rinpoche for highlighting it to help us avoid or deal with these challenges in life.
Dear Rinpoche,
Your teaching never cease to amaze me. We are so, so fortunate to have come to you and receive all these teachings from you. Through your compassion and unending love for us, that we can connect with your Eminence again in this life.
I have been very guilty of all the 10 negative traits over the last 40+ years. And I must admit that looking back, these are the behaviors that have caused me to regret so many actions in my life that I cannot correct and make amends. I can only move forward by avoiding to commit again those past actions through being aware of these beautiful 10 choices that I can make and take.
Thank you again from the bottom of my heart.
May you have long life, stable health and continue to teach the Dharma.
Humbly yours,
Lum Kok Luen
Part of this article really shows us some of our true characters whether we care to admit it or not, some are cleverly hidden while others are exposed inadvertently. I must add that at some point in my life I would regularly hide my real self not wanting to expose much because of fears that these people would enter my private life and get to see the real me that I would rather hide. It is not that I have done something wrong but more to make a good impression of which was not the real me. It is rather a fictitious me that I regularly displayed to the outside world.
My ostentatious character would later in my life surfaced and reveals itself after going deep into meditation and with so many unpleasant episodes that happened in my life, it is just like someone splashing cold water on you and says ‘wake up’. It finally dawn on me and made me realized that it was not really me that the outside world are seeing but an ambiguous personality that I wantonly, explicitly and consciously designed to deceive others.
It was through one of my spiritual awakening learning Buddhism that woke me up and made me realize that fooling oneself is not enough but to fool the whole world is tantamount to creating a false identity. Later on it also made me realize that it is depriving me of the potentiality of delving deep into myself to explore the inherent Buddha nature of our self. I have been to me in this journey and made me become the real me. Be what you are and not what you are not.
The 10 choices above should be the most popular excuses that we give to ourselves when things are not what we expected or when things don’t go the way we want it to be.
Hopefully with these tips in mind I won’t make mistakes or regrets
What if…… Life is full of what ifs. When we made a decision we must take the responsibility ourselves and not regret later on.
We have to learn from our mistakes and move on in life.
Thank you Rinpoche for the sharing.
Jill Yam
Thank you very much Rinpoche for sharing this article and useful motivation tips. Makes us think positively about ourselves. Have more self confidence.Let go and move on.And remember to count our blessings.
I think one of the most frequent words come out from us or cross in our mind is “If I could…it would be better..”, “If I could turn back the time, I would..”…I would have this kinds of thinking some of times..it’s really too bad, because time is the thing you cannot turn it back when it slipped away…Instead of keep regretting, it would be better to let go the yesterdays, and live the todays and tommorows the way we wish we should be, could be better to live with 🙂 Learn from our yesterdays, refrain to repeat any stupid things we have done before, may be is one of the way we did not regret again today and tommorow. I beleive, by applying Lord Buddha’s teachings in our daily life, we sure have less regret and gain more spiritually and in everything we do or we wish for. 🙂
Living with regrets is one of the saddest, if not depressing, things in life as regrets have a way of haunting us time and again. I have made many stupid decisions when I was younger that I truly regretted later on. So, these days, when I make decisions I try to make a decision that I will not regret later. With these 10 tips, I am sure I will be able to make better decisions that will save me from unnecessary regrets.
Thank you for posting these 10 tips. As simple as they seem to be, many of us are guilty of them, knowingly or otherwise.
I think it is true, but it is not worth to think about it all time, because there will always something you might regret in the future. You should think about what you do, but it’s not always possible to see the results of your choice. Sometimes you have to risk something to reach what you want, even if you could regret it when it did not work out.
Thank you for a great article sharing. Wearing a mask is a very common practice to protect ourselves in the society. We’re taught that we need to be nice to others, till we tend to hide our true self and forget who we really are. We try to go along with our friends as we’re afraid that they might unfriend us if we disagree with them. We tend to hide our real feelings as we’re afraid that others might not like us if we express our deep feeling. Therefore what we show to the world most of the time is just a disguise to protect us from being hurt or dislike. The fear of not belong and the fear of not being loved has deterred us from being true to others. We never get true friendship or relationship with this mask on and we’ll get tired of this pretended self eventually. Have we ever pondered over taking off the mask and facing the fear? It takes courage to face the fear and the feeling underneath. We can learn to accept our true self, our feeling even though they are not as perfect as we want it to be. We will find out who we really are and be truly free when we finally let go of all the stories, lies and disguise.
There is another fear we face in life, fear of losing control. This can be seen when we try to manage every single thing in our lives. If we can learn to accept everything in life with gratitude and appreciation, we will understand that everything in life happens for a reason. If we can let go of control, not wanting things happen our way and accept life as it is, we will be more relax & happier.
This should be my mantra… ” We Don’t Grow When Things are Easy; We Grow When we Face Challenges” and indeed I couldn’t agree more, even though I may at times dislike it and prefer to just stick to my lazy comfort zone. But once I accept and just embrace the challenge and tell myself, look I won’t die from it because I am a survivor, that I realise it is exactly what I needed as I needed to learn something from it.
Also this post reminds me to be grateful and count my blessings that I have amazing supportive friends all my life who have guided me one way or another. Now I am fortunate enough to have spiritual friends as well an amazingly precious teacher to show me the way to amend my bad habits and stop the much regrets. So the honours is on me to do the right thing for myself because in the end it is going to be my journey, and I am the one who has to walk it.
Thank you Rinpoche for this positive reminder post which I can come back to whenever I need a wake up call. Much appreciated! Fabulous short positive post that transcends all religion.
We should think twice before we do something because we might regret over our actions forever.
Dear Elisha,
Thank you for visiting H.E. Tsem Rinpoche’s blog and thank you for your truthful comment.
I couldn’t agree with you more on this! I must admit that I have definitely done much share of actions which I regret later. However, it is fortunate for some of us to have good friends, mentors, teachers and influences in our life to give us guidance and often help us back on track whenever we go off track, but what about those who don’t?
This is probably one of the many reasons why H.E. Tsem Rinpoche has invested enormous amount of precious time in sharing articles that gives us guidance, wisdom and insights.
Hope you will continue exploring this blog and share it with others so that they may be inspired and benefited from it too.
This here is a great category you may like to explore further…. https://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/category/inspiration-worthy-words
Hi,
Yeah, I used commit tons of unforgivable sins when I was younger too and now I regret it a lot. I know it’s too late to regret but I just want to change my life. I know it might take some time to change my life as it’s impossible to change something overnight but I shall enjoy the process. 🙂
P/S: Thanks for sharing the link here. Have a blessed day ahead. 🙂
Hi,
Yeah, I used to commit tons of unforgivable sins when I was younger too and now I regret it a lot. I know it’s too late to regret but I just want to change my life. I know it might take some time to change my life as it’s impossible to change something overnight but I shall enjoy the process. ?
P/S: Thanks for sharing the link here. Have a blessed day ahead. ?
This is just a correction from the previous comment.
Hi Elisha,
I am sure you will be able to change your life… if there’s a will, there is always a way and although it may not always be ‘overnight’, (we all know this)… but it is never impossible. Just keep going, enjoy the process and stay positive… it is never over till it’s over! 🙂
If you have any questions at all, please do not hesitate to drop me a gmail.
Cheers and have fun exploring life & this blog 😉
The 10 choices in this blog posts have been seen over and over again by inspirational teachers, but to have them put together so precisely is very empowering.
Life is a roller coaster ride whereby sometimes we make choices which are correct and within the same context we also make choices that we regret. However, all in all remember it is important to be true to the real you, how good or bad it may look, otherwise life will dish you less than what you deserve or worse still even less than what you compromised on.
We all die alone, nobody can accompany you, so let the last moment be one of tranquility and peace that you have lived a life in benefit to others. Not one of grasping to what we may lose in death, as you can take nothing with you except your Karma.
Thank you for this inspiring post, which I read just in time to kick off the day for me.
All the points stated above are so relevant and true. Most people realise this when it is too late, or at a point where something happens in life which makes them feel that it is too late and a shadow of regret overwhelms them. I have had many times, where, I didn’t seize the opportunities that were presented to me, and later on, regretted my wishy-washiness.
Due to ego, or face, or the need of wanting something, we always wear a mask. However, wearing a mask that isn’t us, will eventually get tiring and burn us out, because it just isn’t who we are. And we morph into an individual that will be empty within. We are bestowed with a life for a purpose, and if that purpose is used to be somebody else we are not, then eventually, we lead an empty, meaningless life.
All the above advise are positive and definitely pumps you up after reading, however, the choice still lies in our hands whether we want the change.
Super duper duper awesome article to contemplate and also a good reminder for many of us….!!! How true it is the ugly side of us and we gotta turn it around and be better. Thank you for the powerful article Rinpoche.
If it gets you, it gets you straight to the heart. True and makes you think of your actions so far. Better not regret that to go through life aimlessly.
“Develop a backbone, not a wishbone. Take full responsibility for your life – take control.”
Go for what you want as you are the captain of your life. But make sure that you do not hurt anyone in your quest to chase your dreams. At the end, you do not want to regret being a mean person.
“A life filled with loving deeds and good character is the best tombstone. Those who you inspired and shared your love with will remember how you made them feel long after your time has expired. So carve your name on hearts, not stone. What you have done for yourself alone dies with you; what you have done for others and the world remains.”
In my opinion, no matter what we want to achieve in our life, what’s most important is to be kind to others always. I’ve met high achievers who are totally egocentric. They are lonely and very insecure although they portray themselves to have the perfect lifestyle. They are one of the most unhappy people I know of.
Whereas people who are kind are lighter and happier. They always make the place or people around them better off. They are the light in total darkness. If more people allow their kindness to surface, the world would be a much better place to be.
Dear Rinpoche,
Very good inspirations. Good reminder on how I should conduct myself.
Thank you.
Handy to have a check list to reflect and review our actions every now and then. These 10 mistakes are common which most of us are guilty of for sure prior to applying Dharma in our life. I used to rely on this book that I have, “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff”, to curb that overwhelming anxiety when dealing with imperfections. To me, it make sense to have this checklist because it certainly helps to check and balance our point of view before they became habits and too late for us to change.
Thank you Rinpoche for sharing this checklist with us.
Humbly, bowing down,
Stella Cheang
I’ll like to translate these 10 regrets into positive actions that we can start immediately.
1. Wearing a mask to impress others.
– Be yourselves.
2. Letting someone else create your dreams for you.
-Live your dreams. Go for it!
3. Keeping negative company.
-Choose your friends. Friends who live positive life style..
4. Being selfish and egotistical.
-Love and be kind to others. Be compassionate.
5. Avoiding change and growth.
-Learn and change for the better. Improve a little everyday.
6. Giving up when the going gets tough.
-Rough it out. Smile at adversities.
7. Trying to micromanage every little thing.
-Don’t sweat the small stuff. Let it go. Relax.
8. Settling for less than you deserve.
– Only the best for you.
9. Endlessly waiting until tomorrow.
-Start now. Make sure something is done towards your goals everyday. Can be work or learning how to.
10. Being lazy and wishy-washy.
– Again, make sure everyday, something is done.
Pastor KH Ng
Nice one Pastor KH! Your words remind me of how these 10 points can be somewhat related to the ancient wisdom of Buddhism which teaches us to:
– not to lose sight of the end of our days which is very uncertain
– not waste any opportunities that we may come across
– letting go of our expectations and wrong perceptions of what should and should not be
– change what we need to about ourselves and be more of our good qualities
– perhaps most of all, to live our precious human life to our fullest potential
Thanks Pastor KH for these beautiful words and positive reinforcements. Well said. I must admit that I’ve gone through the past 40+ years of my life doing and living in these ten negative traits. To me it is certainly a wake up call and I feel so blessed to have Rinpoche’s teachings, the Protector practice that I am very confident will help me to change my past negative traits and turn over to these ten powerful traits that will help to make everyone else’s life so much more positive!!
Thanks Pastor KH Ng! I love the way you translate the 10 points to the 10 positive actions! 🙂
I am fortunate enough to meet our Guru and learn the precious Dharma. Your 10 points reminds me of the Eight verses of mind transformation (https://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/buddhas-dharma/eight-verses-of-thought-transformation.html) that will bring lots of happiness to me from within and have less regrets.
I think if we really know our life is really short and precious, we would fully utilise it with virtuous activities and benefiting others, at least at the last moment, there is a better chance that we can go without regrets.
Dear Rinpoche
Thank you for this post, which I found very true and realistic. I have learned some of the lessons in the past via unpleasant experiences. I like advice no. 1 that said we should not wear a mask to impress others, no. 2 Letting someone else create your dreams for you, no 7. Trying to micromanage everything, No. 9 Endlessly waiting for tomorrow and no. 10, Being lazy and wishy washy. Because these are the lessons I have learned the hard way in the past hehe…
Valentina
There are more than 10 choices of that are hindering the results that we desire. Conforming to the norm that what is expected by society, leads to us wearing a mask and not be true to ourself. I am ascertained that it is always ego that have creates most of the choices that arises. I am glad that I have met the dharma at the point that i will not have the time of the 10 years to regret but have made a choice that i will NOT definetely regret for years to come till the time has come for me to leave,