Do something so you don’t regret later…
(By Tsem Rinpoche)
You know what??? Sitting around and not doing anything is FAILURE.
If you try, you have a chance to make it. If you don’t try, then you give no chance to winning.
The time is going to pass anyway, so why don’t you let it pass achieving something really meaningful.
One facet that laziness arises from is fear of failing. Another facet is fear of winning! That is right. Sometimes we have programmed ourselves to lose that it is scary to win. When we win, we have expectations from others that we think we can’t handle. But turn that around. If we don’t think of them as expectations then it is not so bad. We should think that we are inspiring people.
Yes, little old you can inspire people. Haven’t the simplest people in the past brought inspiration to you? Well we are one of those ‘simple’ people and we have the power to win if we keep trying. If we persist and we don’t give up. Giving up is the easy way out. But is it a real way out or just increasing our fears?
Don’t wait. It is glorious to fail, to be laughed at, to be joked about, because when you finally make it, it sure is sweeter in the end… anyways they are really laughing about themselves subconsciously without even realizing.
So simple. If you want something you never had, then do something you never did, is the quote I took from the above that is totally inspiring. I didn’t write this quote, but I am sharing with you. Please pass it to others and be who you want to be and achieve what you want to achieve by doing it one day at a time.
Good luck and prayers to all of you,
Tsem Rinpoche
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What lies ahead is always full of uncertainties. If we are afraid to explore, we never know how much we could have achieved. It maybe scary to try on something new, but we can always take a smaller step at the beginning and be consistent with what we are pursuing. One day we are going to look back and be glad that we didn’t give up.
‘If you want something you never had, then do something you never did.”
Very precise and powerful quote to have a good thought of it. We will never know or win or own if we did not try
Or work it out. Keep on trying never afraid of failure. Do what is meaningful to benefits others before time is out.
Thank you Rinpoche sharing ,this is a very inspiring post.
Dear Rinpoche,
This article is very inspiring.
It is true that many time, we are the person who make ourself failed. By running away from what we suppose to do – because of laziness and many excuses we gave to comfort ourself. Fear of failing, is just another excuses to cover our own ego.
It is very true that, we should try. No harm to JUST DO IT and try! If we never move, we never try, we are so afraid of being hurt, then we still remain status quo, we will never get stronger. We are the loser that we make up.
From this article, i feel i must move on. Do what i suppose to do. Not afraid to anything anymore and no hidding. After all, I will die and i don’t think i want to die thinking i have to try to do something i suppose to do and not doing it, feeling regrets on the death moment.
Thank you Rinpoche for this article
With Folded hands, love,
Freon
Thank you Rinpoche for sharing this quote. This is a very good reminder to me especially, who always fear and lazy to face the difficulty and think of other people’s perception on me.
I agree that we should have a different mindset that our action is to inspire others and not stressing it on ‘me’.
Thank you again for always encourage and motivate us to do better.
“If you want something you never had, then do something you never did.”
This is truly a powerful and thought provoking quote. Being creatures of habit, what we do in general and how we react are pretty predictable. Because we operate in a predictable manner, if we are not getting the results we want, then a change in what we do and how we react is inevitable for a different result. This takes effort and consistency because we may fail many times before we succeed.
The key is to keep going until the objective is achieved. I believe this trait is healthy and favorable to have because with this same trait we can apply it to our spiritual practice and gain Enlightenment.
Its very precise and accurate advise for those of us who wishes to achieve what we have not achieved before.
Dear Rinpoche,
this is really touching and encouraging. this encourage me to live for others, solely for others. Thank you Rinpoche _()_
I used to dread trying something new as I fear failure.(Yes, huge EGO of mine!) But now, I am no longer afraid to try as even if I did fail, I would have learnt something in the process. And by learning something new in the process of failing is in itself winning. Why winning? By learning, one will gain knowledge and wisdom. With those, it is a “win” against ignorance.
Thank you for this post, Rinpoche. It is truly a great post as a reminder to myself to constantly improve and not fear failure so much. Without failure, how am I to know my weaknesses to improve, right?
This quote is beautiful and it becomes more beautiful after Rinpoche enhanced it with details. This applies to me and I shall share it to people I meet online and in person.
If we don’t try to do our best and improve we will regret it.
Instead of focussing on our fear or anything that holds us back we should think that we are inspiring others.
Thank You Rinpoche for this change of perspective which makes a difference for us and for others.
My spiritual journey has help me overcome many of my fear to do something I never do before. It help me less focus of my self centre mind, step out from my comfort zone. Become a Buddhist pastor i need to selfless and take care of other need more then myself. In the organization i have to work with different mind set of people, most of them are new in dharma and some people are not spiritual at or. when your work together with people are not familiar with, you have to build up the friendship and trusting them work as your team member.
Now i have the opportunity work at Kechara Forest Retreat under green team. I never believe what i can do the job well at the beginning because of non experiencing and fear to fail. Sometime after start planting,I gain the experience how to take care and maintain the plants living. Now has growth many type of flowers,forest trees and herbs all over the Kechara Forest Retreat land. I want thank rinpoche by believe in me and let me able to experience all of this.In live, we always want to find peace and happiness. By develop more care with others, concern your living environment and animals.You will find more peace in your mind. I have witness with myself. I thought to sharing my opinion here with this article rinpoche has blog.
Thank you Rinpoche for sharing a short yet very meaningful post. We face challenges in our lives, the whole life through and no end. Some people choose to ignore and wait for others to solve the problem. Some choose to face the challenge and take up the burden and solve the problem for others. Some people’s life stays stagnant because they choose to do the same thing again and again even though they fail again and again they still continue to do the same thing hence they never had a chance to excel and have something that they never had. Those who kept trying, this way cannot try another way and go all the way, they became somebody and inspired others to step out to make their lives meaningful. No matter in Dharma or in samsara, never take NO as an answer because nothing is impermanence. A NO can be a YES if we try.
Yes, I believe ‘simple’ people can inspire many as I was inspired by those people too. Not that they are any lesser than me but because they went and did it. Little things that can inspire many! Instead of sitting around and waiting for something good to happen, why don’t we make the time, effort and do it instead.
Lets not let laziness take over nor keep on hoping… Even if we fail, we should keep on trying and never give up!
Thank you Rinpoche!
This is indeed what all of us need today. The “not afraid to lose” attitude. I agree with many times that when we give up on something is because of the fear of losing. When we have overcome that and be consistent and persevere for our goal, we will make it one day. Everything is based on our attitude and hard work. Thank you Rinpoche for this article. Reminding all of us what we are capable of achieving.
I like what Rinpoche has said about when people laugh at our failure, they are laughing at themselves. I agree with that statement and think that it is very true. Reason being that all of us are afraid of failing, yet when we laugh at others, we are actually rejoicing inside saying that lucky we did not try and failed to avoid from the embarrassment. However, when these people we previously laughed at succeed, we would be then regretting that we did not do what we should do. The person that has succeeded could be us.
It is because of the fear that we constantly have, it hinders us from further growth.
thank you rinpoche la _()_ we are so fortunate to have you as our guidance, inspiration. your hard work, sacrifices are always remembered la…long live tsem rinpoche for rinpoche never fail to shower kindness towards all beings..
Laziness is the biggest cause towards procrastination, fear, and failure. We are too lazy to change the state we are in, the situation we are in, to get out of our comfort zone. There are days I look back and reflect that I should have done this, and that, but sometimes, the opportunity passes and you are never able to do what you wanted again.
People are happy to be lazy, to let things remain, as long as each day they can wake up and everything is still the same, or as it was. But when the situation changes, and they’re not in a situation they’re used to anymore, then reflection on lost opportunities and regrets come. But there’s a solution – before you let yourself fall into that state, you can choose not to have yourself have an opportunity to feel that way. Your decision to change tomorrow, today or yesterday, will determine whether you live a life above average, or just..as is.
To get out of comfort zone and to face the fear of unknown expectations will keep some of us from going all out in Dharma works. It is much easier of course to just give excuses and sit around doing nothing. Then again, will that give us happiness?
If all this while we are not happy with our life, will we find happiness if we are still living the same way without doing anything differently?
Definitely not. Like Tsem Rinpoche says: “IF YOU WANT SOMETHING YOU NEVER HAD, DO SOMETHING YOU NEVER DID.”
And never wait, because we never know when our time in this life will end. So, just do it, now.
A lot of time we always find something/someone to blame for anything that doesn’t work out in our life, but when we look deeper it is actually we didn’t even put effort to work it out and just wait……
Be it for whatever reason but when the time passes there is no point of return. Then we either sit there again and wait…which is wait for nothing or realise it and work it out for something. I have regretted for not doing something and sad to say there is no ‘replay’ for me and got to hold on to it as a reminder.
Now what important is just like Nike says ‘Just Do It’. If we do it we have a chance, be it good or bad the results is another ‘chance’ for us to improve but if we don’t do anything we will not know what ‘chance’ is, we will not know what hope is and we will not know how far we can go. What left if we not doing anything is just stay back behind time getting better with the word ‘regret’.
Many things we let it slipped because of our fear. Fear of what…Fear of coming out of our comfort zone. It is scary as I have seen many opportunities passed not only for myself but for many others. A simple regret from a simple action which I did not do was not saying I love my late father before he passed away and when he did passed away, it was too late. Cause whatever you want to do after that, it is useless.
Therefore, after experiencing the above, I just do whatever it takes without much thoughts. Why? Life is just too short. I saw and experienced many regrets and they were not worth it.
One of the reasons why one sits around and not try is because one is too familiar in comfort zone and procrastinate. How often we tell ourselves “I will do it when ….” or “I am too busy now raising my family. When my kids go to college only then I can do charity”, or “when I retire only then I have more time to do xxxx”.
Procrastination is the thief of time. If you put off doing what you ought to do, you will end up not having enough time to do it properly. Or worse still, it would have been too late.
One of my favourite poems by Edward Young that I stumbled upon when I was young and remains one of my all time favourite:
At thirty, man suspects himself a fool;
Knows it at forty, and reforms his plan;
At fifty chides his infamous delay,
Pushes his prudent purpose to resolve;
In all the magnanimity of thought
Resolves, and re-resolves; then dies the same.
It is true that if we never try, we never know. And the courage (or lack of) to try is strongly tied to our many fears. And because of our fear, we sit and let time slipped through.
Thank You Rinpoche for this inspiring reminder that we should get out of our comfort zone.
Humbly, with folded palms,
Stella
Thank you Rinpoche. This is a very inspiring quote that we should always look at when we want to attempt new feats, challenges and new adventures.
Humbly yours
Lum Kok Luen
Thank you for all of your efforts
Dear Rinpoche,
Thank you very much for everything.
Every time i feel down i have a look at your Blog and within a few minutes i really feel better.
You always teach good things and i already learned a lot, thank you…
We really need more people like you in Europe and everywhere in the world.
Take care and have a lovely day.
Martial
Rinpoche, thanks for the quote “If you want something you never had, then do something you never did “.We always fear of failure, so sometime we choose to give up..yet it is a true that never try ,you don’t know how much you can achieved.Be Brave !
Haha… Rinpoche always tells us if we want to produce something, then we have to create the causes NOW to get to our goal to achieve it. If we never start, then we never get anywhere… so that’s why we FAIL even before we begun!
I always take this example to illustrate the effectiveness of STARTING NOW and think of the the big things along the way. A few years ago, when Rinpoche and a few of His students walk along KL city, they say a few homeless along the streets. In a split second, Rinpoche decided to buy 20 packets of freshly cooked vegetarian food and gave the food to these homeless people. It was from that day, that the causes for Kechara Soup Kitchen came to be, and now… KSK is one department that serves the community, and not only feed the homeless, but help the under privilege and even get the homeless off the streets by searching for them jobs.
We should never let laziness get the better part of us. How often have we had great ideas to create something good to benefit others but we decide to delay or not do it just because we’re lazy or we’re busy pursuing our desires?
Just like what the title says… do something so you don’t regret later… life is not about satisfying yourself, but it’s about giving, being kind and compassionate… helping the poor… that is the only route to having fulfillment in our lives.
I really love this article. My favorite part is “If you try, you have a chance to make it. If you don’t try, then you give no chance to winning. The time is going to pass anyway, so why don’t you let it pass achieving something really meaningful.”It reminds of another quote I read but forgot where: “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take”. If you have the opportunity to do something good, just do it! You will never regret it. No matter how impossible it seems, it is still possible.
We have to remember that time never waits. If we waste time doing nothing, we would have wasted our time and not anyone else’s. If you die with regrets, it will become your fault if you do not take the chances you have NOW!
It is interesting to know that laziness arises from both fear of failing as well as winning. Failing and winning are totally opposite to each other yet they are giving the same impact on us. How can it be?
When I think a bit further, I see that they are actually the same. Fear of failing of course is due to our big ego, we don’t want to lose face in front of others when we cannot achieve something. Whereas fear of winning is also the same. We don’t want to win because we do not want other to have higher expectation on us, and this is because we are too afraid of failure. Then it comes back to the root cause again which is ego.
The funnest things about Dharma is that it always makes us think further and deeper. At the end, we will realise that all phenomena are actually arise from the three poisons, and they all came from our mind. No wonder Buddhism emphasizes so much on taming the mind.
It’s been almost 2 years since i read this post so it’s a good reminder to revisit it again and see how the wisdom within has translated to action. “If you want something you never had, then do something you never did” – so perhaps this new year’s resolution for me would be to embrace the new and continue pushing the limits. Do or die.
….cos if you don’t really do anything great or meaningful, you might as well be dead! For what’s the point of living a life that doesn’t actually go anywhere (whatever that “anywhere” may be for you)…. that would mean we live our entire lives just for the sake of heading towards death?
I like this: “Sitting around and not doing anything is FAILURE.” Absolutely applicable to me, because I’m so damn scared of failing. So yes, sitting there, being scared and getting paralysed by the fear of failure means i haven’t accomplished and will never even start to dream of accomplishing anything. So I have failed before I even began.
One of my very first teachings from Rinpoche was about exactly this. I remember voicing that “I’m just afraid I’ll fail” and Rinpoche screaming back (very lovingly and passionately, of course!) about this – showing me just how silly I really am for even entertaining the thought of failing. Here you go, watch this and then go out and take a risk on something new and successful: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SBTKPihGgK4
Dear Rinpoche, what I learnt from this article is, it is not the result which determine whether we are success or failure. The result can be success or failure, it is ok, not one gets success at the first time. It is so normal to see people get success and failure, but it is rare to see people with great persistence and people who dare to try and go beyond their limit.
We must ‘sacrifice’ a little of our comfort in order to have a greater result, especially when it comes to things that will benefit others. Again, it is not just about the result, but in the process, we become someone who dare to go beyond limit and this really inspired others and give others hope. Thank you Rinpoche for this article. I agree giving up is just a way to increase our fear. We will never overcome something if we give up. The fear remains forever and the fear will become bigger and bigger, until we totally give up to dream, to even think about who we are. Because we can’t even face ourselves…
Once i though while we learn a lesson, we learn a solution. Then, i realize that i am learning to smile along with the progression is far more meaningful. ‘Then’ which mentioned above = above 10 years. Hahahaha….what a long time.
This is so true! “If you try, you have a chance to make it. If you don’t try, then you give no chance to winning. Successful people and leaders are where they are today because they worked hard and never give up even if they fail…they dare to fail… and they are not lazy.
” Sitting around and not doing anything is FAILURE.
If you try, you have a chance to make it. If you don’t try, then you give no chance to winning.
The time is going to pass anyway, so why don’t you let it pass achieving something really meaningful.”
It is so meaningful. I will contemplate it frequently and check myself so that I will fall into the trap of laziness that fear of failing or fear of winning.
Yes, it’s GLORIOUS to fail, to be LAUGHED at, compare to never put in any effort to try.
I never realise there’s fear to be winner because of laziness until I read this article. I have to check myself everyday, whether I am not capable of something or I just merely being lazy.
It’s a good article to share with all my FB friends. I want all to be winners of their life.
I like “If you try, you have a chance to make it. If you don’t try, then you give no chance to winning.” too.
This is very logic and yet powerful words. Most of the time when we came to the junction of do or not do, we always let our negative thought to take charge and keeps thinking “What will happen if we fail?”
Yes, we should think of all consequences when we make decision, but do not let the fear to fail control us. We have actually nothing to fail, especially if we are doing something to benefits others. Even when we fail, inside us we still win because we have done our best to make it.
Thanks Rinpoche for sharing this.
When we know that something is good for us, especially dharma – we should make some time to dedicate effort and work towards it. It may be for a good cause, it may be for whatever reason but if we know in our heart it is the right thing to do, we just do it.
Very true in every way. There were times, fear of failing and winning all mixed up well up in thoughts and this resulting for not going all the way. Hence, not achieving what we want to do. I would say that we just have to DO IT and not letting others’ expectations be in the way to deter us from doing what we have originally planned and wanting to do. To do with passion and wanting to succeed not for ego sake but for fulfillment in accomplishing something successfully. How it turn out to be is all in our hands. No one else. Not even the Buddhas.
Thank you Rinpoche for sharing.
So true. Most of the time Rinpoche always remind us that we CAN do it. If we always say cannot then whats the point for trying anything? There is nothing to lose. If we try and we fail, at least we tried but if we just sit around and not do anything then we fail anyway. Step out of our comfort zones and do the best we can in everything.
I contemplating on below sentence:
“Don’t wait. It is glorious to fail, to be laughed at, to be joked about, because when you finally make it, it sure is sweeter in the end….”
Sometimes, The FEAR of failing that stops me MOVING FAST ENOUGH or DARE TO TAKE RISK… since nothing to loose, also think positively what Rinpoche shared with us:
“When we win, we have expectations from others that we think we can’t handle. But turn that around. If we don’t think of them as expectations then it is not so bad. We should think that we are inspiring people.
Thank you Rinpoche for this amazing post.
“If you want something you never had, then do something you never did” that is so logical but not so easy for us to see sometimes but if it makes a alot of sense. Which is probably why we are encouraged to get out of our comfort zones and push our boundaries.
This is very inspiring, thank you.
Only one part I’m not sure, I don’t really understand how this works, “they are really laughing about themselves subconsciously without even realizing”?
Very insightful and helpful, thank you.
This article in Ukrainian http://mrzhukovskyi.blog.com/2011/03/15/%D0%A0%D0%BE%D0%B1%D1%96%D1%82%D1%8C-%D1%89%D0%BE%D1%81%D1%8C-%D1%89%D0%BE%D0%B1-%D0%BF%D0%BE%D1%82%D1%96%D0%BC-%D0%BD%D0%B5-%D1%88%D0%BA%D0%BE%D0%B4%D1%83%D0%B2%D0%B0%D1%82%D0%B8/
very inspiring message la….it is really touching and inspiring ..we actually learn by trying..with trial and error..we build the game successfully…..it is true….la..your messages are really worth practicing..your holiness
This blog post really did hit me once more. I admit I’ve given up on many things/projects many times. But from now on, I will do my very best in living my life meaningfully by helping others.
Yes, failure is the mother of success as the saying goes! Without failure we won’t know what success is all about. But don’t get despondent by failures as no one is born to fail always, and nobody is born always a loser too. Basing on the logic of impermanance, nothing stays permanent. Failure is not an end in itself. We must move on, and try and try again with greater determination and faith. Faith has been proven to move mountains, but to win again we must move fast. We must not sit around and cover ourselves with self pity, and moan, yet do nothing about our failures, but to put more greater efforts to change our failure to success. Time passes fast and it waits for no one! As our guru said,”It is glorious to fail, to be laughed at, to be joked about, but when we finally make it, it will be a sweet success”. By so doing, we will serve as an inspiration to many others.
TIME AND TIDE WAITS FOR NO MAN. Is it true? Yes I believe its true. What is most important that we should do for our spiritual life first so that we don’t regret when we die.If we are a Buddhist practioner we should think about creating lots of good merits for our salvation from the lower realms. In mundane life it would be nice not to be lazy and do whatever you can and not waste your time that you will regret later and think you should have done it. Many people will say I will leave this and this to do another day. Maybe that day will not come and you loose the opportunity which leads to regret. Even if its a failure you will know where you stand and rectify or solve it and there is no regret.
I totally agree with all that Rinpoche writes in his blog. Its never too late to try anything that we wish to do while we still have the capabilities. Whether we are old or disabled or people who are immobilised can still find things to do according to the functions of their limbs ansd brains. You must put your heart and soul to what you want to do and say I will achieve it. You may be surprise the task you are doing is not bad or hard after all when you are happy and enjoy doing tne work. And most important you must think positive and say in your mind you can do it. A positive mind is the tool for success. I believe nothing you want to do can be failure unless you are lazy. If you fall or fail one time try again and find ways by putting effort. Why waste the time you have with sitting around and doing nothing. Do soimething which will benefit you and others. Time and tide waits for no man. Once opportunities lost are lost for ever. My few experiences with successes that I had was thru Rinpoche’s guidance
that I will be able to make it turn out to be success and not failures. And I dont regret it.
Nobody is a looser, nobody is a failure. Why? Because we can all win.
Nobody is “programmed” to fail, to be miserable and helpless, like there would be this permament “hard-wired” failure being that I am. This is not logical, nothing is permament, even our failed attempts, they will pass and we will succeed eventually.
With this in view we can operate a shift on how we react and how we use our failures, two options:
1. We see our failures as an end in itself and get stuck in them,
2. We see our failures as steps to success and move on.
When, as a child, we learn to ride a bycicle we fail many times, yet we get back on the bike always and try again until we can master the control of the bycicle.
Why don’t we do the same when we “fall” on our spiritual path?
Perhaps we should look at it from the bycicle story, why do we get back on the bike after we have fallen and even hurt ourselves in that fall? What makes us go back on the bycicle, knowing that we will fall again many times before we can master the bike? Why? Because we have faith that we can master the bike. We have faith in that.
So we should ask ourselves: do we have faith in our potentiality for becoming enlightened? If we don’t then we do not have faith in our guru neither, how could we? If we have faith in our guru that can see this buddhahood potential in us, we would be able to trust him.
On the path to enlightenement, Buddha taught the third Noble Truth before the fourth for a basic simple reason, we should recognize our potentiality for buddhahood before we even hear of the path taking us there.
Same: we must have faith that we can bike before we learn to bike, then only do we find the strength to push ourselves.
“If you want something you never had, then do something you never did”
Regret happens when you have waited until it is too late to start living your life. No one can change the past. It is long gone. And you have to live with the consequences of your action in the Present. Until you change and do something different to break the cycle, chances are your future will also be the same, if not worse. No one would like to wait until the end and then find out that we should done things differently. If we have always been the loser, then start creating the causes to be a winner. Learn new skills, un-load all the bad habits and change ourselves. In Buddhism, we say that Liberation lies in the palm of your hands. Only you can save yourself. Only you can change yourself. So, don’t wait anymore. Time’s ticking away so very fast – now, that is scary.
Starting being your best so that you can start enjoying the best years of your life NOW.
Shirley, I love your humor and the way you put things.
I agree with the statement above: “It is glorious to fail”
If it were not for my failures, I would have had no need to seek out the Dharma. My failures have all been camouflaged successes.
One thing that I always repeat to myself to ensure that I never entertain ideas of giving up is THE BEST IS YET TO COME! I really believe that for myself and my path. My best years in the Dharma are ahead of me if I keep at it and never give up. How can I give up when I haven’t even tasted the frosting yet?
This particular blog speaks to me in the most profound way. Here I am, this ex-Queen of Sloth who is hell bent on becoming something more than a fat domesticated self-indulgent pet. I am going to go all the way and woul rather die trying than sit in my bed and rot the years away.
I love this!! “If you try, you have a chance to make it. If you don’t try, then you give no chance to winning.
The time is going to pass anyway, so why don’t you let it pass achieving something really meaningful.”