Joy has been a student of His Eminence the 25^th Tsem Rinpoche for over 15 years. Through the years, Joy has witnessed Rinpoche’s compassion and the unconventional methods he uses to benefit others. Some of the short stories she shares will tell interesting miraculous events that Rinpoche will not mention due to his humility. She hopes these stories will serve as an inspiration in your own spiritual journey.

Rinpoche Through My Eyes – Transforming the Negatives Into Positives

After my late husband Justin Ripley’s passing, my mind was in a really negative state and everything seemed pointless to me. I experienced a whole range of emotions, from sadness to anger, to confusion. If it was not for Rinpoche’s tough love and continuous guidance at that time, I would have fallen into an abyss of despair. I am sure Rinpoche knew that and therefore did not give me room to grieve as my state of mind would have spiralled downward. Rinpoche set me on a schedule with a list of tasks that I had to complete by the end of the day before I left. There was no opportunity to sit and dwell on my loss, no time to wallow in self-pity.

One of the assignments that Rinpoche gave me (which I now realise was profoundly beneficial for me) was to write positive things about my Dharma brothers and sisters on Rinpoche’s blog chat. Every day, I had to choose five people from our writers’ team and point out five positive qualities of each person that stood out to me.

Being in a negative state of mind, this assignment was a big challenge but it turned out to be an extremely good mind-training exercise for me because, at that time, everything and everyone appeared to be flawed. There seemed to be nothing good in life anymore. So, every day, I had to pick five people and force myself to switch from a negative mindset to a positive one. I found it hard to find good qualities in my Dharma brothers and sisters, not because they did not have any, but because my thoughts were negative.

I tried to rotate the members of my team in order to have five different people every day. It was difficult because the writers’ team was quite small. After I had done Person A, two days later, it was back to him or her again, and back to thinking about more good qualities to write about. The five points had to be different each time. It could be something they did that demonstrated a particularly good quality that should be highlighted. For example, if I said Person A was a kind person because he or she did something thoughtful and beneficial, I had to describe briefly the action performed!

Initially, I hated it and it was harder when it came to people I disliked. But what could I do? It was an assignment from my Guru. It was like taking bitter medicine that was really awful but deep down you knew it would be good for you in order to get well. Rinpoche would actually check what I wrote, to see if I was genuinely doing the contemplations or not. Some of my team mates were easy to write about but others were harder due to my own biased, contaminated perceptions of them. There was no other way around this; I needed to change my focus, to look for the positive aspects, the goodness in each person.

I had to do this exercise for a couple of months. It gradually became easier as my mind shifted to looking at people’s good points. This exercise was like a reprogramming of my mind, from thinking negatively to thinking positively about people, and I noticed that it made me more tolerant towards them. Then, slowly, this process expanded to other situations and people. I became more forgiving towards others and more patient. As a result, I became less angry and depressed, and I was able to forgive myself. My negative perception of everything gradually changed to being more positive. In this way, Rinpoche helped me to heal and move on. I became lighter and, in general, more at peace because the peace I achieved came from within.

Who would have thought that such a simple exercise given by Rinpoche would help me to recondition my mind in a positive manner? It seemed as if I was given a second chance in life. Rinpoche changed my perspective and helped me see things in a different light. I do this exercise again whenever I feel that I am stuck in a rut. Now, when I look back, I realise that this was a profound teaching of “nothing changes, everything changes”. This was one of my favourite teachings by Rinpoche, one that really blew my mind. If you can modify your behaviour and recondition your mind positively, a lot of your problems can be easily resolved. You will be less stressed, be more at peace and happier.

Rinpoche always taught us to see the positive side in everyone and everything. This picture was taken when we were having a fun. It was spontaneous photoshoot project that Rinpoche came up with one fine night. I will share the story in another post.

Rinpoche used skilful means, just like Lord Manjushri cutting through our delusions and helping us to see things clearly. I understand now why Rinpoche made us do some of the ‘weirdest’ things. No matter what, just trust the Guru and follow his instructions. It always works out well when we trust the Guru because the Guru only wants what is best for us in this life and in our future lives. It is like having cancer and you have to listen to and trust your doctor. So here, the Guru is the experienced doctor who helps us to heal ourselves of the disease of karma, afflictive emotions and suffering. It is important to follow our Guru’s advice in order to have any transformation, realisation or progress in our spiritual practice. We have to trust our Guru who is the skilful doctor who can treat our illness, just as he did so in my case.

Today, whenever I feel irritated or meet someone I dislike, I remember this exercise and contemplate on the positive qualities of the person so as to create a balanced attitude. It is dangerous to always look for people’s faults, or to always see flaws in them because the flaws we see are reflections of our own flaws and our negative mental states. In the end, we are the ones who suffer; we are the ones in pain and misery. If we keep seeing faults in others, later we might even see faults in our Guru, which will be detrimental to our spiritual progress. This is dangerous because it can lead us to the lower realms as stated in Verse 10 of the Fifty Stanzas of Guru Devotion:

“Having become the disciple of such a protecting (guru), should you then despise him from your heart, you will reap continual suffering as if you had disparaged all the buddhas.”

And even before going to the lower realms, we will create a lot of problems and suffering for ourselves and others, and hence more negative karma.

We should always look at things with a balanced view. This exercise, or rather, this form of contemplation that Rinpoche taught me can be done by anyone. It can help us become less negative and complain less about others. We will not have unrealistic expectations. Instead, we try to look at the good qualities of others, appreciate their kindness, and thus, create peace and harmony for ourselves. This is good for our own mental well-being and in the end, we become happier. This was what Rinpoche was trying to make me realise.

I highly recommend this exercise to anyone because every one of us has something or someone we do not like or are unhappy about. We can start with those around us, those we see on a daily basis – our family members, colleagues and so on. The more we engage in this exercise, the more we will see our perception of others change. We will be more accepting, kinder, more compassionate, wiser and happier.

With that, I would like to end by sharing the White Manjushri short prayer and mantra which Rinpoche prescribed for me during that difficult period of my life. I believe it helped me speed up my transformation, amongst other amazing benefits bestowed by the Buddha of Wisdom! If you like, you can incorporate this prayer into your daily sadhana (prayers).

White Manjushri’s Praise and Mantra

(Composed by His Holiness the 2^nd Dalai Lama)

Click on image to enlarge

I make humble obeisance to you, Manjushri
Great destroyer of mistaken perception,
Wide like the lotus petals are your eyes,
Your mind the pinnacle of expansive bliss.

Your body resplendently white as the effulgent moon,
A sword of Wisdom and Holy Writ in hand,
Your hair coiled in five knots: thus you
Epitomise the splendour and tranquillity of eternal youth.

MANTRA: OM WAKEY DHA-NE-MA
(*At least one rosary per day or more if time permits. You may also contemplate on Lam Rim subjects*)

For more interesting information:

• Rinpoche Through My Eyes – Eating Out with Rinpoche
• Rinpoche Through My Eyes – Tsem Rinpoche, My Protector
• Rinpoche Through My Eyes – Looking for That Switch!
• Rinpoche Through My Eyes – Taboo Words
• Rinpoche Through My Eyes – Cooking For Rinpoche
• Rinpoche Through My Eyes – Vajra Yogini or Anger?
• Rinpoche Through My Eyes – The Assignment
• Rinpoche Through My Eyes – Change Karma
• Rinpoche Through My Eyes – Creating The Causes
• Rinpoche Through My Eyes – Buddha Images and Imprints
• Rinpoche Through My Eyes – Food and Dharma
• Rinpoche Through My Eyes – Spreading Dharma in Jonker Street
• Rinpoche Through My Eyes – What’s the New News?
• Rinpoche Through My Eyes – Mission Impossible

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